Monday, September 17, 2012

There is so much grace in poverty.

I am learning, day by day, moment by moment, need by need, the joy and freedom that there is in having nothing.

The other day, as I was getting ready to leave for school and trying to figure out on the long list of things I needed which ones I actually needed and which ones were consumerism eating away at me, I finally figured out that I really and truly needed jeans, before going back to school they were simply a necessity.  I had $3 in my wallet and owed $50 to my little brother.

So I said, "Lord, I trust that if I don't have it today, I don't need it today, but I need jeans." That night I got paid for doing drinks at a wedding, I had been promised $50, which I had already spent, so when I opened the envelope and $70 fell out, I payed my brother back and went to the store, $20 for jeans and I'm back to zero. One day at a time, I am given everything that I need.

Why does my life work this way? Because it's an adventure, it's real and it's messy and it requires walking on water. When necessities are given one at a time, it is so much easier to see them for the gifts that they are.

So, I'm learning to be poor and to love being poor.